The Ancient Shark Of Despair's blog

Monday, November 27, 2006

Okay. Today I am officially advertising. I put out a bulletin. I did it all like, "I don't care about what I am saying. I have to do it! Uhhhh whatever!"

But then I realised that I really need this money. I tipped Moe two hundred bucks a week or two ago. Let's just say my finances haven't been the same since. I'm broke.

Also, you could probably just like, send me cash or something. Or food.

I'm sorry for begging.
Goodbye!!!!!

1:07 PM

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

I'm sorry for advertising at you guys yesterday. I really need some cash. I told you how much I tipped Moe. I don't really want to tip him that much, but I started out tipping him well and I can't really break the pattern without it seeming suspicious. I don't want him to stop coming because he thinks that he's just giving away freebies.

Anyway... The kid has been a bit mopey today, which actually made me feel more energetic in comparison. He's been quiet since I told him the truth about his mother.

We don't really spend a lot of time actually talking, so it was kinda hard to start a conversation. I asked if he had any way of getting hold of her and he just did one of his stares where he does something with his lips. I said that I thought it might be nice to have her around for a few days.

"Why?"

"You know, we could do stuff. Play a bit of scrabble. Watch TV?"

"She told me that she has been visiting you every week since she left. She said that you never visited her."

"Yeah. She's been helping me clean. But I don't really need her anymore. I thought that maybe you could help me instead."

He didn't say anything back.

"You heard the message on my answering machine. She hasn't been around since then."

He squinted at me. He looked around a few times. Then he focused on the bathroom door.

"This place is filthy..."

"Look, she hasn't been doing a very good job. There's grime everywhere. All of the doorknobs are sticky."

"She's got bad knees."

"I think it's her back. She's got a bad back."

"Is that why you fired her?"

"I don't really know."

He slouched down a bit. He seemed really vulnerable. It's really awkward when he gets like this. I don't know what to say. I just stood there for a minute and then I went to the kitchen and stood there for a bit. It's actually a bit of a relief though. He's been really bossy the whole time and he's been at me constantly for all sorts of things. He laid off for the rest of the day.

6:04 PM

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User comments.

Dave Dave Dave

I knew it!!!!!

Posted by Dave Dave Dave on Wednesday, November 29, 2006 at 9:24 AM

The Ancient Shark Of Despair

Love isn't something that you can keep.

Posted by The Ancient Shark Of Despair on Wednesday, November 29, 2006 at 5:50 PM

Friday, December 01, 2006

I really want to use this opportunity to talk about community. This is something that I am quite interested in and even feel strongly about. I think we should be supportive of other people. We should try harder to be nice to people. If someone says something bad at you, smile. Let it go. And don't just label someone with a character attribute that you made up or just based on one or two incidents just so that you can gain a bit of ground in an argument. It's not nice. And if I disagree with you a few times on a few occasions don't go and say next time that we argue that I'm just being different or that I just want to argue. When you make blanket points like this it's actually just cheating.

The Ancient Shark of Despair

10:28 AM

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User comments

Kasia


This sounds like "turn the other cheek", and that's disturbing. Who made you sad?
Posted by Kasia on Friday, December 01, 2006 at 5:20 PM

The Ancient Shark Of Despair


It is disturbing. I'm just sick of everybody always trying to win.

Who made me sad?

I think this is definitely the correct way of putting it. Man. They made me sad, but only I can make me angry.
Posted by The Ancient Shark Of Despair on Friday, December 01, 2006 at 11:30 PM

Nukite


Dear The Ancient Shark of Despair
I recommend M Scott Peck's The Different Drum.
Regards
Julia.
Posted by Nukite on Friday, December 01, 2006 at 5:26 PM
[Remove] [Reply to this]

The Ancient Shark Of Despair


I don't... I don't really have time to read this.
Posted by The Ancient Shark Of Despair on Friday, December 01, 2006 at 11:32 PM

The Ancient Shark Of Despair


"We know the rules of community; we know the healing effect of community in terms of individual lives. If we could somehow find a way across the bridge of our knowledge, would not these same rules have a healing effect upon our world? We human beings have often been referred to as social animals. But we are not yet community creatures. We are impelled to relate with each other for our survival. But we do not yet relate with the inclusivity, realism, self-awareness, vulnerability, commitment, openness, freedom, equality, and love of genuine community. It is clearly no longer enough to be simply social animals, babbling together at cocktail parties and brawling with each other in business and over boundaries. It is our task--our essential, central, crucial task - to transform ourselves from mere social creatures into community creatures. It is the only way that human evolution will be able to proceed."

This is a quote from that book that you just recommended.

Ok. I get it. This guy sees it like I do. He says the problem is you guys being social creatures instead of communal ones. I think he is referring to when people form teams to win, but then someone else in the community now loses. An example of this would be when two of you form a team in an argument and then decide together that I'm wrong even though I was making some good points and being objective. Yeah, it's pretty sick.

Posted by The Ancient Shark Of Despair on Friday, December 01, 2006 at 11:38 PM

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Moe came round last night. He made me a bit sad. I told my son to go hide in the kitchen while I dealt with Moe. He smiled at me with this really proud look on his face. He was even pushing his lips together in an attempt to stop from smiling too much. It was kinda sick. I then asked him for some cash.

Moe sounded a bit more upbeat this time.

"Hey Moe."

"It's actually Mike"

"Okay, how is work?"

"Uh, good. Good."

At this point his head opened up and this robotic arm started working its way out of his skull. I wasn't freaked out or anything. I knew this about Moe from the first day that I met him. He probably knew that I was from outer space too. He just didn't know he knew. I stared at the robotic eyes that replaced his old ones and I told them that it was okay.

This was his first time. You can tell by the way he had this really scared look on his face when he turned. I felt sorry for him. I didn't want him to be scared. My son heard the commotion and came running in.

"Dad! Dad! What's happening?"

"Go back to your room, boy. Everything will be alright."

Moe was scared. He started letting out robotic screams. Robotic screams sound like really high pitched.. well, really high pitched Burzum. It's scary. But I could handle it. I'd seen it all before.

The kid totally freaked out. He started breathing really loud. It was like his was making the sounds of breathing with his mouth instead of actually breathing. Like he was just letting us know that he was breathing hard. He pulled out a gun he had been hiding in the back of his pants. He pointed it at Moe and screamed.

Two months later we found out that The Kid had been a spy the whole time. He was never really scared.

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User comments

Roxy

I'm confused at the time jump here. Is Moe still healthy?
Posted by Roxy on Saturday, December 02, 2006 at 12:10 PM

The Ancient Shark Of Despair


I'm not allowed to tell you. I wish I could though. If I could tell you, I'd tell you that it's all okay.
Posted by The Ancient Shark Of Despair on Thursday, December 07, 2006 at 4:06 PM

Sunday, December 03, 2006

The kid sort of inclined that his mother is coming round. I only actually found out because I've got good people skills. I can usually tell what people are really thinking. I'm not psychic or anything, it's just that I'm good at seeing through the masks that people wear.

He had just bought the items on our shopping list. I'm 'supposed' to have put anything that I need from the shop on the list. He has stated many times before that if it's not on the list he's not going to buy it. I think this is impractical. I think one of us should be in charge of everything. One of us should keep a check on what we need and maybe be a bit creative when it comes to getting new stuff. He should be in charge of going to the shop and maybe even handling all the money. All shopping related activities should be the done by one person.

I'm no good with money, so I think the kid is going to have to be the one to do it. He says that I must grow up. He seems to think that this is some elaborate scheme of mine to get him to do more stuff. Thing is, I'm not asking him to do anything more. He already keeps check of what we need and he already goes to the shop. All I'm asking him to do is buy more stuff that I might want. I'm not asking him to splash out on luxury items. I just want him to treat us sometimes. I want him to buy sweets.

When I asked if he bought some sweets he got a bit upset. Then he took out some tea. He just put it on the table and looked at me. I saw through this. Neither of us drink tea.

"So. You bought tea?"

"We didn't have any left."

"Oh, I must have finished it all the other day."

"There hasn't been any tea in the house since I got here."

Insert passive-aggressive tone for his last statement.

"Is this about the shopping list?"

This was me genuinely trying to cut through to the heart of the matter.

"I thought we might need some tea this week."

"I don't like tea."

I don't.

He looked at me and started moving groceries around. I realised at this point that his mom was coming. She likes tea.

5:10 PM