Archives for: July 2010
25: season 12, hour 16
Jack got into the Chevy Astro Van and buckled his safety belt. They drove onto the highway.
"What is the mission?" Guy asked him.
"We must acquire Bagels for the orphanage" said Jack.
"What is a 'Bagel'? I have never heard of them" said Guy.
"A Bagel is like, boiled or steamed bread, or something" said Jack.
"Is it like Dim Sum?" said Guy.
"....No." said Jack. "I cannot believe you don't know what bagels are"
"In my village, we ate a lot of Maize. We grew blue Maize and made tortillas." said Guy.
"Where are you from?" said Jack.
"I am from Minnesota" said Guy.
They drove down the highway for half an hour and exited onto a county road. The County road was unpaved. "Where are we going?" said Guy.
"We must journey to the town of Hickory. There is an old Bakery there."
They drove past a a traffic sign that indicated the speed limit was 45 miles per hour. As soon as they passed it, a hidden Sheriffs Deputy pulled a lever that flipped the sign over! Now it read 35 MPH!
The Sheriffs Deputy Patrol Car turned on its sirens to apprehend the Chevy Astro Van. "no Damn Way! I was not speeding" said Guy.
Jack got on the CB radio. "What is the problem, deputy?"
"You all wuz speeding in a 35!" said Deputy Elmo. His partner Deputy Wesley chimed in. "That's Right!"
"I do not believe that. hit the gas, Guy" said Jack.
The Chase was on. some blue grass music kicked up on the radio. they approached a sign on the road. "Bridge out!" said the sign.
"the Bridge over the Crick is out!" Jack warned Guy.
"Bridges? I don't need no bridges!" said Guy.
He shifted up again and hit the edge of the Crick at full Speed. The Chevy Astro Van jumped into the air! Jack stuck his head out the window "YeeeeHaaa!" he crowed.
"Yeeeee Haaaa!" crowed Guy.
The Chevy Astro van landed safely on the other side of the Crick and kept going.
Deputy Elmo braked and turned wild before he hit the Crick. His Car skidded forward and flew right into the Crick! He opened the car door and stepped hip deep into crick water. Deputy Wesley pulled a fish out of his hat and spit up some water.
"Holy Shit! that is a strong Van!" said Deputy Elmo.
